Loaded question, anon. I hope this was just you being quizzical and not you trying to cause a fight. I know quite a bit about loss. I went to my first funeral at just a few weeks old and they’ve just continued regularly since then. The first death I really remember was my Aunt Suzie’s. She was my dad’s favorite sister and was in her 30s and had died after a long battle with breast cancer. My dad kind of went off the rails when she died, did a lot of bad shit, and my mom ended up leaving him for a couple of years. That was a great loss to me. Up until that point, I was fairly normal. After that, I ate more, cried more, did worse in school, and was an altogether gloomy person. In junior high, a good friend of mine passed away. After that point, I developed some not-so-healthy coping behaviors and dipped into a deep depression that has yet to let up. As I’ve gone through my adult life, I’ve lost many people to death and to indifference. Many people left me just because I was so depressed. I wasn’t fun and bubbly anymore so why stick around, you know? This hasn’t happened for awhile and I’m thankful for that. Recently, I lost my father to lung cancer and that was a really difficult loss. I don’t think it’s really sunk in that he’s dead. I haven’t really cried since I found out when I was in the hospital.
So yeah, anon, I have a lot of experience with loss.
Just know that your time will come much too soon, even if you live to be 80 years old. I’ve lost too many people lately and to be the survivor is horrid. I’d compel you to live life to the best of your ability and accept that death will come when it’s meant to. And that time is years from now.
Also, I might call you House. Don’t you remember when he stuck a knife in a socket because he was wondering if there was an afterlife? It’s best to just live life as it comes. Peace.
Know that I care for you and want you to know that the world would be a worse place without you. You can get through this and I’m here if you need an ear. Be kind to yourself. Lots of love.
never ending list of people I want to make out with: olivia wilde
"I think it’s very healthy to spend time alone. You need to know how to be alone and not be defined by another person."
I’m not going to be on much the next couple of days. I’m traveling to a family funeral and won’t have my laptop. So hopefully Liv doesn’t have her baby while I’m there!
Thanks for being here tonight, anon. I really needed a little lift. :) Sleep well and good dreams.
I’m glad you like my blog. It’s what keeps me going sometimes. And being passionate about Olivia? That just comes from realizing what an amazing person she is. :) Not to mention beautiful.
Liv and Paco. Liv and Paco. Liv and Paco. LivandPaco. Liv and Paco. Liv and Paco. Liv and Paco. LivandPacooooo.
It makes me actually do something instead of just sitting on tumblr browsing. I feel compelled to post more Liv because I don’t want my followers to get annoyed that I’m answering so many questions (because I don’t get many usually).
Thanks, sweet anon. I like that you’ve been sending me all these asks. It keeps me on my toes.